Thursday, January 31, 2008

My Bad. Or Not.

I was working with my technology students one afternoon last week and one of the boys was not on task. He was not working on his animated movie, but was in Power Point creating something. I called him down and he calmly told me that I had told him to work on that particular project. Which I had. But I had forgotten. So, I said "Sorry, Justin. My bad."

And the kids groaned in agony. GROANED. "Mrs. Who, that is so old! Nobody says that anymore!".

And here I thought I was just on the cutting edge of kid lingo. Not. So I asked them what they said in place of My bad. And they proceeded to show me some hand slap, spin movement which ended by saying "Peace" to each other. I couldn't duplicate it if I tried. I have no idea whether this is something that replaced "My bad" just at my school or whether this is the new big thing.


I miss the days when everything was groovy. I really liked groovy.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Crack For Dieters

One day last week I was home with a miserable nose. Hah! I meant cold and typed nose. That tells you just how stuffed up I was. In bed, in my sleeping pants, surrounded by used Kleenex, watching "Gilmore Girls", I was craving a snack. So I sauntered on into the kitchen and opened up the diet cupboard which is full of those 100-calorie snacks. And I saw them. Nabisco Chips Ahoy candy bites. Not just cookies, mind you. These are tiny balls of cookie yumminess COVERED with candy. Hmmm. I think I will try them.

Do you like malted milk balls? Like the crunch of candy that leads to the goodness of sweet heaven inside? Then, oh good golly, you will like these. They don't TASTE like malted milk, they taste like chocolate chips cookies. Covered with candy. With candy. Are you getting the concept here?

I may have gone back and got another package. I may have eaten a couple more packages after my nap, during which I fell asleep so hard that I had that jerking twitch you do when you feel like you are falling. You know? So, really. The whole 100-calorie concept was kind of lost on me. Because I ate like 600-calories worth. I think they have a little crack in them.

The Crack Cookies. Try to eat just
one package.
I dare you.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Do You Have Any Interior Design Questions? Because I Can Help You Out.

So, I've been trying to get some curtains hung for quite a while. Quite a while. As in more than a year. Liz gave me some cast-off curtains when they changed their window dressing and that was before they moved so it had to have been...well, quite a while. Like I said.

When I bought sheer lacy curtains for the dining room and living room, I bought an extra pair for the family room. They never looked quite right. The living room and dining room have hardwood floors and oriental carpets and dark furniture and the lace curtains looked right. Kind of old-fashioned. But the family room has light oak furniture and wall to wall carpeting and a more modern feel. I never liked those lace curtains in there. So I thought about changing them and there they hung. For about 5 years or so. We often move faster than the speed of light around here.

The curtains Liz gave me were kind of a canvasy cream color with rings in the material at the top - perfect for a more casual look. All I needed was a curtain rod. I bought one rod and it was too big. A few more months went by. During this time I probably went to Wal-mart and Target and the mall approximately 4,329 times and during each of those times I could have picked up another curtain rod. But no. I didn't think about it until I was at home in my recliner looking at those damn lace curtains again. And I would make a mental note to pick up another curtain rod.

Finally. I was at
Sarah's house and she had the most perfect curtain rod and I asked her where she got it and she said Lowe's. So I made a mental note. And the next time I was out shopping, I stopped at Lowe's and bought a curtain rod. At last! I was so pleased with myself! I could hang my fabulous curtains!

So, today. I got out my trusty screwdriver, took down the old curtains, was appalled at how dusty they were (must take down the others and wash them. maybe in the next year or so I'll get to that), spent fifteen minutes attempting to get the curtain rod OUT OF THE PACKAGE, finally put up the brackets for the new, fabulous dark curtain rod and got the curtains ready to hang.

The rings wouldn't fit over the curtain rod.

The rings in my fabulous new, FREE curtains would not fit over the curtain rod I had just ripped from the package, and screwed securely to the wall.

So I guess I need some new curtains.

And I'm hoping it won't take another year.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Four Things Meme

OK, another meme. Nobody memed me. I just memed myself. Wait. That sounds a little self-centered. Whatever. I saw this on another blog and appropriated it. OK, that sounds better. Meme yourself if you like it. There I go again.

Four Jobs I have Had

1. Working in a trash compactor factory. I had horrible bruises on my legs from lifting up the compactors.

2. Working as a grill cook in the canteen in college. I was the only employee they ever hired who successfully allowed a hamburger to slide INTO the grill and catch on fire. They couldn't stop talking about it. Really.

3. School Technology Coordinator at my school. My friend Vicki and I went to a class on assembling computers and caught the computer on fire. Do you see a pattern here?

4. Clerk in a very tiny children's book store. I took my baby daughter with me and, while closing up one night and managing her, I forgot to lock the door. I got a call in the middle of the night that the door of the shop was hanging open. Man. I'm a GREAT employee.

Four Movies Watched Over and Over

If you read my blog, you know we love movies so we watch A LOT. Let me think about four I would watch several times. Hmmm.

1. Ghost

2. Romancing the Stone

3. The Mummy

4. A Walk In the Clouds

Four Places I've Lived

1. China (Taiwan, actually)

2. Missouri

3. New Jersey

4. Kentucky

Four TV Shows I Watch

1. Lost

2. Two And A Half Men

3. Grey's Anatomy

4. Star Gate Atlantis

Four Places I've Been

1. Mexico

2. Alaska

3. Jamaica

4. Belize

Four People Who Email Me Regularly

1. Vicki

2. Liz

3. Debbie

4. Maquel

I need a longer list. I live by email.

Four Favorite Things To Eat

1. Liz's lasagna

2. Chocolate cake with homemade caramel icing

3. Soft chicken tacos

4. Spinach and artichoke dip with nacho chips

Four Places I Would Rather Be

1. On the pink sand beach in Bermuda

2. At Denali Park in Alaska

3. At Dunn's River Falls in Jamaica

4. On the terrace at the restaurant in Palm Springs that had the great seafood enchiladas

Four Things I Look Forward To This Year

1. Spending a week in a beach house in Pensacola with my family

2. Tom's retirement (and mine next year)

3. Taking Wesley to another art class this summer and being able to converse with him about it

4. Every single First Thursday dinner out with my friends

What about you?

Friday, January 25, 2008

For Fun Friday

Check out this great site. You can type in the title of a book you like, and it will find other books you might like to read.

You don't want to eat your vegetables. FINE. You can play them then. Not play WITH THEM. Play them.

Use this web site to figure out how much gas will cost to go visit your friends or family.

Forget about those grocery store flyers - use this web site to get all the good deals. You can even search by store, make a list and print it out to take with you.

And finally. We get lots of credit card offers. Lots. I mean it. Lots. I think the better your credit is, the more applications they send you. Like "Hey! You are good with your money and don't have many credit cards at all? Why not get some credit cards and spend some of that hard-earned cash??? You know you WANT TO."

Normally, I shred those applications but sometimes I get lazy when we get three or four in the mail IN ONE DAY and I will just tear them into pieces. I have been known to just tear them in to two or three pieces.

No more.

Apparently, it is possible to tape those pieces back together, mail in the application asking for a credit card to be sent TO A DIFFERENT ADDRESS and actually get a card.

I'll shred EVERYTHING from now on.

I hope you do too.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Super Geeks

Now this is just how geeky we really are. Y'all already know how obsessed Tom and I were about watching the old episodes of "Smallville" and you may possibly remember (if you have absolutely nothing else to do with your time) the little game we had going with "Caw".

Well, you know with the writer's strike, there's not much on TV and we have to do something in between getting our movie fixes from Netflix (since I am forced to alternate our movie selections with seasons of "Gilmore Girls" - why yes, we do watch a lot of TV, what's your point?), we decided to go back and watch "Smallville" over again.

Yes, we are that geeky and obsessed. So, the other night, they showed something to do with the crows school team and I called out "Caw!". And Tom turned around and said (actually a trifle annoyed) "You can't just say caw anytime, you know." And I said "Oh, really?" And he said "Yeah!" and then he took my "Gilmore Girls" DVD and he snapped it in two. And he laughed an evil laugh.

OK, not really. But I bet he would LIKE to. Actually he said we had to come to an agreement about when to say "Caw". Like, we had to have rules and everything.

Now some people might have laughed out loud at this. But no. I joined in the discussion in quite an animated manner. It wasn't until later that I realized how totally and completely lame we are.

So we agreed. It has to be a banner that says something about the school team. It cannot be a varsity jacket. He came up with that one on the fly just because I beat him to the caw. Sore loser. It has to actually have a picture of a crow on it. He had the nerve to think he could slip that one past me. I don't THINK SO, Mister.

I am the first to admit this has caused some cursing at our house. "Caw!" "Damn, I didn't even see that." "Caw!" "Awwww, I missed it."

This is kind of similar to a drinking game where you have to take a slug every time you see something on the screen or a character says something.

But that would actually be cool. This is totally not cool. It's really pretty geeky. Super geeky. But, oh. There is some serious laughing going on.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Works For Me Wednesday

Shannon over at Rocks in My Dryer has a weekly happening in the blogosphere where bloggers can contribute something they have done that works for them. I now have something to contribute. But I have to say. When writing a blog post about something takes longer than actually DOING something, that says something about the blogger. I'm not sure what. I'm afraid to think about it.

Wes has lots of toys at our house. Toys, books, cars, games, you name it. And they have sort of...taken over. When he comes over, we have to dig through the boxes and piles to find the things we want to play with and that just eats into some serious tummy tickling time. I didn't like that. I like things ORGANIZED. (Now, at this very moment, Tom is saying how I don't mind things WITH A LITTLE DUST ON THEM. And this is so true. But they are ORGANIZED.)


So I decided I needed a shelf of some kind. A shelf with some kind of bins in it. I had a mental image. Always a bad thing to do. But I finally decided to check the Mecca of shopping, according to bloggers - Target. And I found the perfect thing. PERFECT. And, in my ignorance, I thought it would just pop out of the box like a little, angelic genie, already assembled. Because I have a tiny bit of difficulty with assembly. When I put together a high chair for Wes, it was absolutely perfect. Except the shelf for his little feet was on the back of the chair. Hey! It shouldn't fit together that way if it's not right. Now, you may be thinking I have a husband who is very handy. He IS very handy. He is also very lazy. And I am very impatient. I was things done NOW. He thinks in a few days is just fine. So. I have to put things together myself. Anyway.

The almost perfect shelf.

Apparently, it will not pop out fully assembled. Damn.

I'm a little afraid now.

Man. Look at all those pieces.

Now, I'm just saying. Don't the directions for Step 1 and Step 2 look JUST ALIKE?

Uh. Maybe I can do this.

Sure I can.

Am I good or WHAT?

Where is a magazine photographer for the perfectly assembled item when you need one? And, Voila! We are now ORGANIZED. And dust-free. For the moment.

To complete this transformation yourself (and buy it for less than I paid at the store, even with shipping - how annoying is that?) go to: Target Toy Storage Shelf. You can get it in white or light colored wood. If you need any help putting it together, give me a call. Because you know. I'm an EXPERT. And it's not even put together BACKWARDS.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

No Sweaters

I went shopping yesterday. I actually just had a few errands to run, returning and exchanging a couple of items, and having lunch out for a little treat. I only had one rule for myself. Absolutely, positively, no kidding, was I allowed to buy any sweaters. I have what some might consider an excessive number of sweaters.
But what is excessive, really?

To some people a dozen sweaters might seem excessive. To others...well, perhaps it's better if I don't put down exactly how many sweaters I have. I wouldn't want to give Tom cause to faint dead away in his office chair as he reads this. And I might just possibly have sweaters in similar colors that are almost identical - but not quite. Like my two light purple ones. They are cable knit turtlenecks but one is a slightly different color of purple. Completely different really. Completely.

So. No sweaters.
Well. I might, just possibly, have purchased a sweater. OK. Two. Oh, all right. For God's sake, you are a nag. Three. That's absolutely it. Just three. One might have been a black turtleneck when I actually already technically have a black turtleneck. But it does not have a cable knit design. And it was not only $10.13 ON SALE. And this one could totally be a fall back sweater. Like, what if that one gets a snag? Or is in a suitcase that gets lost? What would I do then? I would have NO BLACK SWEATER. Yeah. I see you have no answer to that. It's exactly like this one, in case you are interested in purchasing one for yourself.

And the other two? Well, I had just picked up some light blue corduroy pants at the dry cleaners and was walking through Penney's and mulling over the fact that I had no sweater that matched those pants perfectly when, LIKE A MIRACLE, I saw this sweater on the rack. At that EXACT MOMENT. Or sometime close to then. I'm sure it was the same day I was thinking about those pants. Anyway. It's a really interesting, loosely woven sweater that kind of looks like someone made it by hand. It was on sale for $13.50. So, of course I had to get the peach and gray one too. You know you would have too.

Aren't they CUTE?

And look HOW GREAT it matches the pants?

Now that I am thinking about this, these sweaters are really good investments. I mean, I can wear them all winter. And next winter too. Great investments. And the way the stock market is doing lately? This may be the best investments I've made lately.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Fabulous Birthday

It's fabulous to have a birthday dinner cooked by your daughter, who is a wonderful cook.

It's pretty fabulous to have a birthday meal cooked by your daughter, who is a wonderful cook, who also has the most perfect son on God's green earth.

It's pretty damn fabulous to have a birthday dinner cooked by your daughter, who is a wonderful cook, who also has the most perfect son on God's green earth, whose house is only ten minutes from your house.

It's pretty damn frackin' fabulous to have a birthday dinner cooked by your daughter who is a wonderful cook, who also has the most perfect son on God's green earth, whose house is only ten minutes from your house AND BE ABLE TO WEAR YOUR SLEEPING PANTS THERE.

Man, what a great birthday.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Are You Smarter Than A Preschooler?

Pre-school children were asked the following question:

"In which direction is the bus pictured below traveling?"

Look carefully at the picture. Do you know the answer? The only possible answers are "left" or "right."

Think about it.

Still don't know?

Okay, I'll tell you. The pre-schoolers all answered "left." When asked, "Why do you think the bus is traveling in the left direction?" they answered: "Because you can't see the door."

Forget about being smarter than a fifth grader. I'm not smarter than a preschooler. I never even thought about the door.

Are you a Republican or Democrat? Which candidate should you vote for? Check out this quiz.

I'm not going to tell you how long it took me to find all the states. OK. 4 minutes. Yes, I am lying. It was 5 minutes and 20 seconds.

Just how much of a Sci-Fi geek are you? Let's find out.

Sci-Fi Quiz

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Kid's Books That Have Made A Difference To Me

Due to overwhelming demand from my blog readers...OK, one person and she is my daughter...but I'm sure the rest of you would make a comment demanding this information if you only had time to make a comment. Anyway, after the post about books that have made a difference to me, she asked for one about kid's book that have made a difference to me.

Since I am an elementary school library media specialist, I spend a lot of time with kids and books. And love it. Interspersed with my piles of books for grown-ups are the kids books that I am busily reading so I can keep ahead of their reading and be ready when they ask me for a book just like Harry Potter. Only not so long. Or so hard. Do I have one that is about 100 pages long?

Like the grown-up books I read, there are the good ones and the bad ones and a whole big bunch of mediocre ones. There seems to be even more mediocre kids books than grown-up books. But we won't worry about those. Let's talk about my favorites.

The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (the whole series), by C.S. Lewis

These are my favorite kids books. My absolute favorite. I have read them dozens of times, read them to my children and have read them to my students. You would think these would be a childhood favorite, but in reality, I didn't know about them or read them until I took a children's literature class in college. I loved them so much that I chose to talk about them to my college class as part of an assignment and got embarrassingly choked up as I told about them. They are that good. Since the movie came out, they have become more popular with my students and I love that. The whole idea of another world existing so close to our own is so magical and fabulous, it gives me goosebumps.

Gone-Away Lake (and Return to Gone-Away), by Elizabeth Enright

I just checked Amazon to make sure these were still in print and, thankfully, they are. These are books that I read when I was young and I adore them. Gone-Away lake is a place, actually a swamp, where there used to be a lake and vacationers had beautiful, huge, summer homes which have fallen into disrepair. The place is discovered by a group of kids and they take it over, creating clubhouses in the old homes and making friends with an old couple who still live there. Although it is not fantasy, it seems fantastic that they create their own world and the adults in their lives allow them that freedom.

A Wrinkle in Time, by Madeleine L'Engle (and the others in the series)

Perhaps you can tell from the name I chose for my blog identity that this is one of my very favorites. The story of the kids who must travel though space and time to rescue their father, exhibiting courage and their love for each other, is timeless and very special.

Lad, A Dog, by Albert Payson Terhune (and others by him)

I also checked on this one to make sure it was still in print since it, too, is very old and was a childhood favorite. I loved all the books by Terhune and the world he created in the Limberlost with his beloved, beautiful dogs was so real to me, I wanted to live there.

Big Red, by Jim Kjelgaard (and others by him)

Until I started making this list, I had forgotten how much I loved dog stories when I was a kid. For years after reading all of Kjelgaard's books, I desperately wanted an Irish Setter.

Seven Day Magic, Edward Eager (and others by him)

I love stories about the possibility of magic actually happening. In this one, some kids check out a library book and find out it has magic powers and can take them wherever they want. The Magic Treehouse books author copped the same idea, but this one is a hundred times better. I also loved Half Magic. They got half of what they wished for. Think about it. It created some real problems.

The Borrowers, by Mary Norton (and others in the series)

I love the whole idea that little, tiny people are living in your house and borrowing whatever they need in order to survive. A postage stamp can be a picture on the wall for them. How cool is that?

Hatchet, by Gary Paulsen

Next to fantasy books, my favorite genre is survival stories. In this one, a young boy is stranded in the wilderness after a small plane crashes and he must survive alone with only his wits and a small hatchet. Readers loved this book so much that Gary Paulsen wrote several sequels and even an alternate ending one.

The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane, by Kate DiCamillo

This is probably the newest book on my list and I'm not sure what that says about a hip librarian, except that some of the older books are better than a whole lot of the new ones coming out. This story about Edward, a china rabbit, and his journey back to the one who loves him best is one of the best books I have read in a long time.

I could go on and on for page after page after page. The fantasy books by Susan Cooper. The humorous family adventures of Beverly Cleary. The Black Stallion books. The Indian in the Cupboard books. So many. So many, many wonderful books.

It will take a lifetime to read and reread them all. And to read them aloud to my grandson. And isn't that just so marvelous?

If you want to order any of these books, please click on the Amazon link up on the right. I will get a few pennies if you order through that link.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

I Vant To Bite Your Neck

Mark was telling me recently that I should really unplug my cell phone charger when it's not charging because it was using energy even when it is not plugged into my phone. I nodded but inside I was thinking skeptically "Oh, right. How is that EVEN possible. The electricity has no place to go, how could it possibly be, like, just draining out of there?" And, after all, he is my son. My child. Even though he is, technically, an adult, and even though, technically, he did work for a phone company for quite a while. Really, how could he know?

Then I found this quote: "Even when your cell phone isn't charging, that big plug it uses is warm - because it's using energy even when it's doing nothing. Physically unplug chargers from the wall to keep them from silently sucking down wattage while you're not using them." (from

Huh. Maybe he does know what he is talking about. Then I linked from that site because, really, who wouldn't like to know about energy vampires? And found that lots of our electronic gizmos are sucking up the energy even when they are NOT EVEN TURNED ON.

Who knew?

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Gilmore Girls Has Stolen My Couth

I am very well groomed. Honestly I am. For God's sake, I wrote an entire post about choosing one outfit. But I have become obsessed with "Gilmore Girls". Obsessed, I tell you. I come home from work and when I find a Netflix DVD in the mailbox, I am gleeful. GLEEFUL, I tell you. I put on my sleeping pants and a loose top and socks and crawl into bed. Socks! I haven't worn socks to lounge around in since...well, since high school. When my parents kept the house so friggin' cold that I had to wear knee socks to bed. It was such a shock when I went to college and realized it was actually warm enough in the dorm to sleep in my bare feet. Quite lovely, it was.

But somehow socks just seem to go with the whole slob image I have going on when I am in "Gilmore Girls" mode. My hair is sticking up everywhere, I have no makeup on and I'm pretty sure there are some cookie crumbs in the sheets. I have NO IDEA how those got there. I actually got a bowl of cereal with milk and ATE IT IN BED last night while in my sleeping pants. It was granola with raisins. It was healthy. Hey. Don't judge me. But I'm sure it was quite a picture. All in all, it's a damn fabulous experience.

I have no more couth. "Gilmore Girls" has stolen it all.

And. For those of you who love "Gilmore Girls" as I do? You will totally appreciate this video.

Monday, January 14, 2008

What A Feeling!

So, I was just taking down my Christmas decorations and...what? It's three weeks after Christmas? Yes? What's your point? Oh, you don't HAVE ONE? I didn't THINK so. Anyway. I was taking down my decorations and I put the music channel on cable TV. Suddenly, in the midst of taking down my wee Christmas village, "Flashdance - What A Feeling" came on.

I. I was possessed. I had to dance. And I ran in the family room. And I danced. I danced to the ENTIRE song. I shimmied, I shook, I jumped, I kicked. I sweat.

I think I may have hurt myself. Just a little bit.

Dance. You know you want to.

Friday, January 11, 2008

It's My Blogoversary!

Yes, my many, many (many) (I know of least 8 family members) readers, it has indeed been a year since I have brightened your days with my blogging presence. Counting this one, I have now posted 256 TIMES. Whew. I have learned a lot since that very first blog post where I went into excruciating detail about an episode of "Bones".

I wasn't sure at that point exactly what I was going to be writing about. To be honest, I'm still not sure. Maybe you have noticed that? In the past year, I have written about everything from silly topics like shoes and napping to more serious ones like the death of my father and the importance of my family and friends. I've enjoyed the writing. I've enjoyed reading all the posts again in anticipation of doing some sort of yearly overview. And, without further ado (although you KNOW I do like the ado), here is one post from each month last year about which I am pretty proud. For one reason or another.

January, 2007: I love napping. So, I wrote a whole blog post about it.

February, 2007: I often write about my job as a Library Media Specialist in an elementary school and how much I love it. After reading over this list, sometimes I wonder why.

March, 2007: This letter to my parents-in-law made my husband cry. It made me cry when I just reread it.

April 2007: I have written several posts about our travels, but this one about climbing a waterfall is one of my favorites.

May, 2007: Unfortunately, I still have the muffin top I wrote about in this post.

June, 2007: I love all of my friends and write about them often, but this post about a dinner out is one of my favorite.

July, 2007: I write about my grandson pretty often, but this post about our art class this summer brings back some great memories.

August, 2007: I tried writing a few flashback posts about my childhood and I enjoyed this one about losing every article of clothing I owned. Almost.

September, 2007: And then. Whenever I get too full of myself, something like this happens.

October, 2007: October was the month of PUERTO VALLARTA so, even though other things may have happened that month, pretty much my whole life revolved around that trip. My favorite post about it was the one about all the great food. Nom, nom, nom. Great food.

November, 2007: I write book, tv, and movie reviews sometimes, but I feel pretty proud about this one reviewing The Fountain. Especially since it made some total stranger really irate. "I hate pessimistic people like you..." Snort with laughter. He really knows me, DOESN'T HE?

December, 2007: I write about food pretty often but I like this post about how fast food has changed - or have we?

So. Thanks for hanging around all year. Thanks for reading. Thanks for commenting. It means a lot to me that you came to this party. I hope you'll stick around for another year. Or two.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Huh. You Really CAN Find Anything On the Internet

Tom came back in the bedroom while I was curled up in bed watching an episode of Gilmore Girls. No, he has not become an aficionado; he was just visiting. There was a scene where one of the characters was tying her dad's tie because she had printed out the directions from the Internet and she noted that you can find anything on the Internet. "That's true", Tom commented from his position with his head in my lap, having his hair stroked. Really, why would I need a dog?

Well, it's true. You truly can find anything on the Internet. Have you seen this site about reuniting lost gloves? You know how you lose that one glove? And you can never find the other one? Well, now you can find that precious lost glove. At least, you can if you live in Pittsburgh. But they are planning sites for other cities as well. I'm a little cynical about this site since they actually have a link for "Media Inquiries". But it was a clever idea. Very clever. They are planning a book, for God's sake. Why can't I think of stuff like that?

Maybe a lost sock site? Lost earring? Throw me a bone here.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

A Recipe For Relaxation


1 grandson, two years old

1 ladle

1 plastic cup

1 kitchen sink half full of soapy water
1 tired grandma
Fill the sink with warm soapy water. Put the grandson on a chair. Hand him the ladle and a plastic cup. Relax for 1/2 hour. Then you will need to change his wet clothes. Because the water may splash a tiny bit. While you have him undressed, kiss his belly and neck. He may try to push your head away while giggling hysterically. Ignore him and kiss the aforementioned areas repeatedly.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Guess What We Had For Dinner Last Night?

Go ahead. Guess.

You will NEVER guess. Go ahead.




We had AN APPLE for dinner.

I am SO serious. We had a late, kinda big lunch and when dinner time rolled around, Tom said what are we having for dinner because I would like something light and I said maybe we could just have one steak fajita?

And he said. I was thinking really light. Like an apple.

An apple. We have been married for thirty years. We have never had fruit for dinner.

I sliced two apples, and put each one on a plate with a couple of pieces of cheddar cheese and some crackers.

It looked fresh and crispy and just right.

It was.

Monday, January 7, 2008

"To Sleep, Perchance to Dream"

Copyright © 1995-2004 uclick, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

I'm really very annoyed with you. Keeping all that information to yourself. Not sharing it with me. Not letting me know. Yes, I'm seriously annoyed.


SLEEPING PANTS. I'm talking about SLEEPING PANTS. Yes, I know practically the entire human race has been wearing sleeping pants for a few years now. My husband, my children, my son-in-law, my nieces. Probably most of my friends, although we haven't sat around in our pajamas for, like, ever, so I don't really know about them.

For Christmas, my mom gave me a set of sleeping pants and a matching little red t-shirt. It was a cute outfit but I immediately thought I would need to exchange it for some silky pajamas. My lounging ensemble of choice up to this point has been silky pajamas, with a robe over them if it gets nippy in the house. My husband persuaded me to try them on, that I might like them, give them a chance. So, on Christmas day, I took a relaxing bubble bath and slipped on my new sleeping pants and t-shirt.

Seriously. I may NEVER wear anything else again. I'm not saying I'll wear them to Walmart, but I'm thinking very hard about a way that I can possibly wear them to work. Maybe a school-wide pajama party. I'll have to try to make that happen.

Because. Oh. My. God. These things are so comfortable. So. comfortable. I realized I wasn't going to be able to wear the same pair of sleeping pants for the next five or six years, so I went shopping yesterday and bought another pair. OK, two. OK, three. Shut up. At least it wasn't like I bought eleven pairs of shoes.

And I would have bought more but that's all they had in my size. I'm checking the other store today. And, due to the wonder that is the Internet, I can show you what I bought!

Aren't they CUTE? Because, you know. I have to look cute even when I am LOUNGING.

Picture from

I bought a cream colored top and a brown top, which I found, strangely enough, in the men's department. I wanted long sleeve casual tops and most of the ones in the women's department were either too fancy or too expensive. The man's top has sleeves that are a little long but I just rolled them up. So, at this very moment, I look EXACTLY like the picture above. Except I am not a size 2. I'm slightly bigger. Slightly.

I would NEVER wear my sleeping pants to Walmart. But I'm just idly wondering if I could get away with it at the grocery.

What do you think?

Now, that would have been the end of my post except I just had to tell you this. When I was looking for a quote or idiom or something about sleep to put in my post title, I stumbled on the expression "sleep sex". My mother often told me that you learn something new every day. This is so, so true. This is definitely an ailment my husband would like for me to acquire. I love that it's not "always problematic..for their partners". Heck, no. They are probably THRILLED when their partner has this problem. I leave you with the definition of sleep sex.

Sleep sex or sexsomnia is a form of non-rapid eye movement (NREM) parasomnia (similar to sleepwalking) that causes people to commit sexual acts while they are asleep. The first doctor to coin the term "Sleep sex" was Dr. David Saul Rosenfeld, a neurologist and sleep doctor from Los Angeles, California. The proposed medical diagnosis is NREM Arousal Parasomnia - Sexual Behaviour in Sleep, and is considered to be a distinct variant of sleepwalking/confusional arousals (ICSD 2). The condition was defined by three researchers from the University of Toronto and the University of Ottawa in a paper called "Sexsomnia — A New Parasomnia?" published in the Canadian Journal of Psychiatry in June 2003. Sufferers are often aware of their behavior for a long time before they seek help, often because they are not aware that it is a medical disorder or for fear that others will judge it as willful behavior rather than a medical disorder. However, the reality of the condition has been confirmed by sleep disorder researchers who have made sound and video recordings of patients with the condition and observed unusual brain wave activity during the episodes similar to that experienced by other parasomniacs. It is a mind/body disconnect that occurs during sleep. In many cases it is a pre-cursor to neuromuscular disease and is treated with muscle relaxants and other medications.... Sexsomnia is not always problematic or extreme for those who experience it or for their partners. There is a great variety in both the frequency and levels to which people are affected by this disorder.

Friday, January 4, 2008

It's The End Of The Year As We Know It

Meme from Sundry Morning. Check it out.

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
Hopped a plane to Puerto Vallarta and ate ourselves into a near-coma.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I'm pretty positive my New Year's resolutions had to do with weight loss so, no. Unfortunately, no.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Yes, my nephew had a beautiful little girl.

4. Did anyone close to you die? Not this year. My dad passed away last October.

5. What countries did you visit? Mexico. Mmmmmm. Coconut ice cream...

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
 A digital camera that does not cause subjects to look like they have been turned into zombies. (with the red eyes?)

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? There was no one date, but this is the year I gave up caffeine. And it ended up being no big deal.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Actually making some money from ads on my blog. Getting some freelance writing work.

9. What was your biggest failure? Not losing as much weight as I would like. Not staying in shape.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? No.

11. What was the best thing you bought? I have discovered sleeping pants. LOVE sleeping pants. I, however, will not ever wear them to Wal-Mart.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? As annoying as that stick-thin Angelina Jolie is, she has been doing a great deal to try to improve conditions in the world. I think she has been an influence on other Hollywood individuals as well.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? There are so many...but I have to say how disappointed and depressed I was to read recently that Brendan Fraser had left his wife of nine years. I thought he was one of the good ones.

14. Where did most of your money go? Equity payments, bills. What else is new?

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Again, the coconut ice cream in Puerto Vallarta. And, oh yeah. The scallops in cream sauce appetizer.

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?

"Don't Blink", by Kenny Chesney

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? Happier every year!

b) thinner or fatter? Maybe slightly thinner. Slightly.

c) richer or poorer? A little richer. It would help if the stock market would stop crashing.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Travel. Hopefully we will, after we retire next year.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Laundry.

20. How did you spend Christmas? With family and friends. Again, I'm very lucky.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007? I fall more in love with my husband every day. Yeah, I know. A little sickening.

22. What was your favorite TV program? We are TV nuts but one of my favorites is "Journeyman". It gets better every week.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? Hate? No.

24. What was the best book you read? Oooooh, that's a tough one. I read a LOT of books. The best kid's book was definitely "The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane"Best adult book. Uh. I can't remember. It probably wasn't very prestigious because, when I just tried to look up a list of the best books of 2007 to jog my memory, I HAD READ NONE OF THEM.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? That I actually like Christian rock, like Casting Crowns.

26. What did you want and get?
A trip to the beach. Wow. I wouldn't have any answers to this meme if not for Puerto Vallarta.

27. What did you want and not get? There's never enough time to just relax and read.

28. What was your favorite film of this year? One of the best chick flicks I have seen was "The Holiday". There were a lot of cool guy movies, but I think I liked "Transformers" best.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I was...old enough to drink. Probably dinner and a movie; I can't really remember. Maybe I'm a little bit older than old enough to drink. Because I have no memory anymore.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?If my son could have found a job he really enjoys much sooner.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? Classic. And classy.

32. What kept you sane? My family. My friends.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Toss-up between Michael Biehn and David Boreanaz.

34. What political issue stirred you the most? Drilling for oil in Alaska

35. Who did you miss?
My dad.

36. Who was the best new person you met? I can't think of anyone new, but I have new insight and understanding of my sister-in-law because of her blog.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
A baby's laugh can absolutely make your day.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

So I just sit right here and have another beer in Mexico:
Do my best to waste another day.
Sit right here and have another beer in Mexico:
Let the warm air melt these blues away.

"Beer in Mexico, Kenny Chesney

OK, I'm kidding. How about this one instead?

My blessings are in front of me
It's not about the land
I'll never beat the view
From my front porch looking in

"My Front Porch Lookin In", Lonestar

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Practice Makes Perfect

I have experienced many perfect days. Eating in Puerto Vallarta. Wearing the perfect outfit. Any day with my grandson. But I believe yesterday approached perfection in many ways. Let me just bullet them for you.

  • Instead of going back to school, we had a snow day. A SNOW DAY. Added to our Christmas vacation. As a bonus. And they decided the night before. So I never even set my alarm.

  • I got the first DVD of Season 5 of Gilmore Girls in the mail. And let me just say? I am still annoyed you did not tell me about this show. It is quite simply fabulous. I put on my boots and parka (0ver my pajamas) and got it out of the mailbox. Bless Netflix. Bless them, I say.

  • I had candy left over in my Whitman's Sampler.

  • I had leftover snacks from our New Year's Eve Lord of the Rings extravaganza. Yes, we watched all three movies in our pajamas on New Year's Eve. We live on the edge.

  • I took the DVD, my leftover snacks, my candy and a big glass of Diet Mountain Dew in bed with me. I popped in the DVD, pulled up the covers and didn't get out of the bed for about four hours. Aside from bathroom breaks.

  • Could life POSSIBLY get any better?

  • I didn't think so.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

I'm Baaaaaack!

Well, that was a nice little blogging vacation.

If you are a teacher, you know we love and appreciate our Christmas break, but always think...if we just had ONE MORE DAY, we would be PERFECTLY content.

Well, we got one more day today. It's a snow day. Could life possibly be any better?

I'm sure you've already heard from the entire blogging world about their Christmas vacation, blah blah, lots of family and friends time (it was WONDERFUL), blah blah, presents out the wazoo, blah bah, sleeping late, blah blah, candy, cookies, cake, pie until you just want some frackin' salad, for God's sake! And that's how it was. And now I'm back. Did you miss me?


I find it EXTREMELY ironic that my blog stats while I was on hiatus were roughly the same as when I was not on hiatus. What does this mean? Well.

Apparently, just as many people are reading my blog when I am writing daily as when I AM NOT WRITING AT ALL.

Hmmm. Hopefully, this readership was comprised of new individuals who stumbled on my blog and were catching up on all those fabulous pieces on shoes and such. Because it is just too depressing to think it is my regular (10) readers checking the blog and going "Huh. Guess she didn't write today EITHER. Guess I'll check back tomorrow. And the next day. And the next."

So. I am back. And it's been almost a year of blogging for me. I'll have a blogoversary post here pretty soon. Stay tuned. You can check back tomorrow.

I'll be here. It's a promise.