I May Need To Join A Wedding Recovery Program

I just got up. I went to bed at 11. That means I slept approximately 12 hours. Although I really went to bed at only 8 California time! But, as my niece Jennifer says, you can't have it both ways. You are either on California time or you are on Kentucky time.

So.

I guess I slept 12 hours.

In my defense, I was TOTALLY scrunched between two guys on our flight from LA to Houston and, even though they were very pleasant, I spent the entire flight with my hands in my lap and my shoulders smushed together. I didn't think I was every going to be able to spread my arms wide again. And this could be very important, especially if I ever have to conduct an orchestra.

It could happen.

Then, on the flight from Houston to Louisville, I sat down and nobody seemed to be assigned the seat beside me. YES. I could stretch out, I could get comfortable, I could relax...then this guy came up from the back of the plane and asked if I was waiting for a companion, gesturing to the empty seat beside me.

Oh, if only I had moved over into that seat as I had contemplated. If only I could think faster. If only I was a better liar. Instead I said "Uh. No." And he sat down, saying something about getting away from the laughing, shrieking girls in the back of the plane. Since that is probably PRECISELY what people thought of me, my niece and my sister-in-law on the trip down, I couldn't argue. So he sat. In a rather fragrant wave of unwashed clothes and old cigarette smoke. At least it wasn't body odor. Could have been worse.

So I don't know if it was the smell of my companion, who spent most of the trip hunched forward with his hood over his head or the pollen that hovers over Kentucky in the fall which was apparently just waiting to be sucked into the plane's ventilation system, but I suddenly had an extremely runny nose. Luckily, the stewardess handed over several napkins because trying to find my kleenex in my bag which was stowed under the seat in front of me would have required a better contortionist than me. Although I did manage to dig out the Junior Mints. A girl has priorities, after all.

So I stumbled in the house, took some allergy medicine and fell into bed. And slept like the proverbial log. But we are already planning our next trip to California. To visit the Grand Canyon.

And NOT decorate the entire place with ivy and twinkly lights. Although I may have to fight my sister-in-law on that.