"I'm A Travelin' Man" Uh. I Mean Woman.

One of the most exciting times in my writing career was when I was able to write the post about talking to my editor, which resulted in me writing a blog for the local newspaper. But the other day I had something even more exciting happen.

Most of you know that I am planning to retire in the spring after twenty years as a library media specialist in an elementary school. There are a lot of things I want to do when I retire, but first on the list is to TRAVEL. Tom and I want to see the world, preferably from the deck of a luxurious cruise ship, reclining in deck chairs, as someone brings us fabulous chocolate desserts on a silver tray. And I want to write about all that. But I got to thinking how nice it would be if someone would actually, you know, PAY me to write about travel and, in a lovely and ideal world, PAY ME TO TRAVEL. So. I designed a blog (with quite a bit of help from my graphic designing daughter), came up with a presentation and approached a local travel agency. And whadda ya know? They actually like the idea.

They are not quite ready to pay me a huge salary and send me on a cruise around the world but they are ready to give me a chance and that's all I ask. We are tentatively talking about putting me on some sort of commission basis. I just hope this is not like the time I worked for McDonald's and I was giving out samples of Chicken Nuggets because, yes, they were a NEW PRODUCT and I am EXTREMELY OLD and we were supposed to get a credit for every person who ordered chicken nuggets, based on our recommendation. Since I was actually the only one giving free samples of this luscious new product, I technically got credit for everyone who ordered them. This did not make me popular in the break room. There may have been some hair pulling. Some ketchup packets squirted in my direction. Some french fries left in my locker.

Oh, not really. But there totally COULD HAVE BEEN. Wouldn't that have been a much better story if there had been?

And can't you see what a great travel blogger I will be when I am so easily distracted from my story about the great beaches of Thailand by a story about working at McDonald's?

I know you can't wait.

Check it out here: http://thetravelauthority.blogspot.com/

And let me know what you think.

And if you are the teensiest bit interested in writing about that fabulous trip you took or sharing videos or photographs from it? Contact me. I might be able to use some of your stuff.

Try It Tuesday: Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream

One Sunday, a couple of weeks ago, I was looking for a quick, easy and fun dessert to serve for our weekly family night. I was browsing through the freezer aisle and found these.

Are they not the CUTEST things you have ever seen? In case you can't tell, they are tiny little (3.6 ounces) servings of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. They even have a cunning little plastic spoon hidden in the lid so in case you have an ice cream emergency? You are TOTALLY COVERED.

I know it would be cheaper to buy a gallon of ice cream, but where's the fun in that? I filled a large bowl with several different flavors (Cookie Dough, Strawberry Cheesecake, Chocolate Brownie and Cherry Garcia were the only ones I saw) and set it on the table. My family was delighted and it was just fortunate that I had a variety of flavors because everyone grabbed a different one. We didn't actually use the plastic spoons. But they were there. Just in case we needed them.

Apparently, other people think these are equally fabulous, because I actually found a video extolling their wonderfulness.

Check these out and let me know what you think.

In my library, the 500's are absolutely the most popular section. And, for those of you who did not memorize the Dewey Decimal system when you were in school, that is the science section. The section where the books about animals are located. Although you can also find books about domestic animals and pets in the 600's.
Why, yes, I am a total geek librarian. Read more at my Herald-Leader blog here.

It Comes Full Circle, Doesn't It?

Tom has a new camera. I had nothing to do with the purchase of said camera. He researched it, he went and purchased it and he has been learning how to use it. I wanted something roughly the size of a credit card that I could tuck in my purse and use with one click of a button. He bought a big black monstrosity with a lens the size of Mt. Everest. He went in and out of the house the other night half a dozen times to determine exactly WHY it was not taking 4.5 pictures per second, as it was supposed to do. Wrong lighting. Hmmm. Can only take 4.5 pictures per second outside. Good to know. Just in case I ever want to take 4.5 pictures per second. Like that will EVER happen.

One of the things the new camera will do is take video. He brought it over to me to show me a sample video he had made, just messing around, filming the family room, etc. When it first started, I honestly assumed he had our son Mark do the narration. And then I realized that was Tom talking. Not Mark. Sounded EXACTLY like our son.

Full Circle.

He has decided he wants to learn even more about the camera. He used to have a passing interest in photography years ago but it was pushed aside by a budding interest in the new-fangled invention they called a computer. So he announced he wants to take a photography class. He wants to be a better photographer. Downstairs in the storeroom, we have boxes of pictures that his dad took. Really professional looking pictures that he developed in his own darkroom. He even entered a photography contest one time and was disqualified because the judges said his pictures were obviously taken by a professional. So. Tom wants to take pictures like his dad did, many years ago.

Full Circle.

Life is a strange and wonderful, nonending circle, isn't it?

For Fun Friday January 23, 2009

If you can't remember CRAP (I'm right there with ya) send yourself a text message. To the FUTURE.

http://www.callthefuture.org/

A REAL bionic man. As long as that arm doesn't start thinking for itself...

http://www.wimp.com/bionichands/

Who else remembers this sound?

http://www.sonnyradio.com/dialupkid.htm

Not So Free After All

A couple of weeks ago, we got a free 2-liter of Diet Pepsi with our pizza order. I guess it was not TECHNICALLY free since we had to pay for a pizza to get it but we had paid for the same pizza in the past with no bonus gift so it was, in essence, free.

It sat in the fridge for a while because we didn't drink it that night and didn't have a reason to open a whole 2-liter drink until I finally opened it the other day to have with my lunch. I reasoned that I could drink some with lunch and we would polish off the rest later with a snack or dinner.

I sat leisurely eating my lunch, leafing through a magazine and pouring a few ounces of Diet Pepsi now and then. Then. I absently reached for the bottle, my fingers slipped, it tilted, I grabbed for it and squeezed a little too hard in my exuberant attempt to keep it from spilling.

Diet Pepsi rocketed out of the bottle, spewed on the wall, the table, the floor and all over my arm and the sleeve of my shirt. I set the bottle down and sat there, dripping. I grabbed a couple of wet paper towels and began cleaning the entire area, then had to change my shirt and put the Diet Pepsi-drenched shirt in the washing machine so the sleeve would not turn a permanent, streaky, blotched color. It took me about 15 minutes before I could get back to my lunch.

Maybe that drink wasn't actually free after all. After all the TIME it cost me.

I'm not sure what is more pitiful about this story. That I just shot Diet Pepsi all over my kitchen and my arm. Or that I IMMEDIATELY went to my computer and wrote about it.

Did anyone else see the article in the Herald-Leader on Monday about cruising and how the prices have plummeted as one of the many effects of this tumultuous economy? I already knew cruise prices had dropped drastically because I have been doing a lot of travel research lately in preparation for possibly starting up a travel blog, but this article just reinforced my long-held belief that EVERYONE should take a cruise. Read more at my Herald-Leader blog here.

I Have A Bladder The Size Of A Gnat

You know how sometimes you get all ready for bed and brush your teeth and pee and then you remember you wanted to check one thing on the computer like the weather or maybe your email or you just want to see if anything has been added to your Google Reader and then you want to quickly check your work email and THEN you are all ready for bed and you go in your room and start to go to bed and you realize.

You have to pee AGAIN.

You know how that happens?

Oh.

Me either.

Try It Tuesday: Granola Bar Taste Test

I am a big fan of Granola bars. I realize that probably sounds like a contradiction for someone who is a big fan of Pop-Tarts, toaster strudels and iced sugar cookies, but it's true. They are quick and tasty and easy to eat in the car with one hand as you race to school because you had to have just 15 more minutes of sleep but you also needed extra time to style your hair because it's grown enough now that you have to blow it dry with that round brush and that takes FOREVER. So. They are a staple around here.

I have tried several different kinds, including the infamous Fiber One bars, which I refuse to link to because even though they are moist, chewy and delicious? They cause one to have...how to put this delicately and in a ladylike manner... a bit of an issue with expelling wind. Which could possibly cause your husband to sit up completely on the couch, turn to you and ask if you are having some sort of ISSUE this evening. SO. We don't eat those anymore.

My favorite so far has been the Nature Valley granola bars which are sweet, chewy and quite fabulous. I like them all but my favorite is the fruit and nut one. For a change of pace (why, yes, changing the kind of granola bar is an exciting CHANGE OF PACE for me. Shut up.) I'll buy the flat, crunchy ones which are also delicious. Recently, I decided I should once again try one of the Kashi products because they are lower in calories and actually healthier, blah, blah, than the Nature Valley bars. This is even though I KNOW the Kashi crap products taste pretty much like someone has taken a cardboard box and carefully cut it into lovely and creative shapes, packaged it and placed it on the grocery shelf. All those ads you see in the magazines about how they try so hard to make their products healthy and DELICIOUS? Lies. All lies.

Because I bought them again recently since they also had a fruit and nut granola bar and I had a taste test. And now? The Kashi crap product is in the trash can. And the lovely, lovely Nature Valley bars are nestled safely in my pantry.

Do your own taste test. Let me know. I'm really interested. Does anyone actually EAT the Kashi crap products?

Oh. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

An EXTREMELY special day. Oh. The inauguration? Yeah. There is that. I guess that's PRETTY special what with the first African-American president evah and the economy plummeting downward like an errant, runaway airplane and our high, high hopes for some big changes in the next couple of years. Yeah. There is that. But that's not what I'm talking about. Did you forget this blog is about ME, ME, ME? Don't worry, I won't ever let your forget. Read more at my Herald-Leader blog here.

"I Love Trash"

Well. I don't exactly LOVE trash, but I am pretty darn excited about my new trash can. I mentioned my new trash can purchase as an addendum to my post about a rather unexciting shopping trip and now I feel a little guilty because THE LOVE I feel for my trash can should be extolled in a post all of its own. So here is that post.

I LOVE my trash can.

It's so new. So shiny. So. Totally. Fabulous. For years - seriously, YEARS. At least...um...15?...no really. I had a kind of beige plastic trash with a lid that flipped up. Perfectly acceptable. But I really wanted a nice stainless steel one. What I didn't realize I wanted until I actually owned it is a trash can with a lid you can flip up with one touch of your foot. Hands full of trash? No problem! Flip the lid with your foot! Hands all covered with meat loaf fixings? No problem! Flip the lid with your foot! Hands...well, you get the idea.

So, I just cooked dinner and flipped the lid on my trash can several times and then I realized I just had to share the fabulousness that is my new trash can with you. So? The fact that I have a new trash can that I love?

Is totally fabulous.

The fact that I am this excited about a trash can?

Is a little disconcerting.

So, if you need a little excitement in your life? You can get one here. Just like mine. And you can also listen to the "I Love Trash" song here.

In fact. You COULD listen to the song WHILE putting trash in your trashcan.

If you are COMPLETELY wild and crazy like me.

For Fun Friday January 16, 2009

The awesomeness of this picture is somewhat dimmed for me by the size of that rather terrifying spider.

http://www.darrenhoyt.com/2008/09/01/all-the-way-down/

Great videos to learn how to do ANYTHING from cooking to dancing.

http://www.expertvillage.com/

Can you keep your little guy from getting squished? I can't.

http://www.jellyjumper.com/

"How Much Is That Magazine Because I Threw Up On It?"

"The magazine you checked out? You...threw UP ON IT?"

"Yeah."

"Uh. Well. HOW did that happen?"

"I was running. And then I threw up. On the magazine."

"Well. It's $3.50."

"OK. I'll bring it to the library tomorrow."

You KNOW you TOTALLY want my job, don't you? Hey. He didn't throw up IN the library. Could be worse.


So I was reading a blog post the other day that started "Back when I was cool..." and I thought I should TOTALLY write a blog post that started that way.
And then I realized. I could never do that because I was NEVER cool. Seriously. I am not cool now. I was not cool in college. And I was absolutely not cool in high school. Read more at my Herald-Leader blog here.