Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Egg Makes Break For Freedom: News at 11

We usually have a big, hot breakfast on the weekends. During the week, I leave for work before Tom and we each normally have something quick and easy. So we enjoy a hot breakfast on Saturday and Sunday. Sunday morning, I put on some country ham to fry, set the bread in the toaster ready to toast and got the eggs out of the refrigerator. I took out the ham, sprayed the frying pan with Pam and cracked one of the eggs.

Then it happened. The GREAT ESCAPE. I cracked the egg like I always do, gently on the counter, and the entire egg SLITHERED from the shell, completely intact. It landed halfway on the counter and halfway to the stove, right across the seam which separates the two. For a moment, I stood, dumbfounded. I have never seen an egg do that. Some of the white might slip out of the shell or a couple of drips might escape, but never an entire egg. While I was staring at it, it quickly began to slide into the seam between the stove and the counter. It was like some gelatinous, alien entity, making an escape. I dropped the shell and began scrabbling at the slimy mass with both hands, trying to keep it from sliding completely down into the crack. It was determined. Slipping between my fingers, some of it oozed down the crack. With the fingers of one hand (ewwww...it's getting under my nails) I kept pushing it back and with the other hand, and reached for the paper towels with the other hand. Further...further...ha, got one! I smooshed the paper towel into the egg and began the cleaning up process.

It took several paper towels, including one wet one to completely clean up the mess, before the area was again free of oozy aliens. I guess I'll have to pull the stove out later and get the part that escaped. I just hope it can't recreate itself from the part that oozed away. What, you haven't seen any science fiction movies?

I'm looking forward to lunch. How much harm can a tuna sandwich do?

2 comments:

steenface said...

Raw eggs freak me out! Well, more specifically, egg yolks. Scrambled eggs are the only way to go. (And Eggbeaters, just to make sure the sucker won't magically come to life or something.)

But you'd be surprised at how tricky tuna sandwiches can be. Sly ones, they are.

barbara said...

Increbile title and a great story!