I Lost My Pants. But Not In A Bad Way.

It’s supposed to be spring around here but it’s still winter and I think I need to get some of my winter clothes back out only.

I can’t exactly find them.

It was warm over spring break and, gleefully thinking that warm weather would last and I would be wearing capris! and sandals! and spring dresses!, I carefully packed my sweaters in two plastic bins but my other clothes bins had been used to fill with baby toys when I cleaned out the boy’s room so I put all my pants in a white plastic garbage bag. I folded them neatly and tucked them in the bag, thinking I would put them in a plastic bin whenever I had a chance to buy one and now. Now that I need them again, I can’t find them. I’ve looked in my closets and in the basement storeroom and everywhere I can think of and I’m wearing one pair of black and one pair of navy that I kept out on the OFF CHANCE that we might have a cold day or two and looking longingly at my bright new capris and spring tops hanging in my closet with the tags dangling.

I have one pair of bright green socks in my drawer because I put off washing all my socks, thinking I would not need them again! It was warm and springtime! I would wear only sandals from here on!

So I guess I’ll have to wash some socks tonight or I’ll be wearing bright green socks with my black pants. Or possibly my navy ones. Since those are the only pants I can find.

I’m afraid I may have accidentally donated my pants to Goodwill. Since they were in a white plastic garbage bag. And that’s normally what I put things in to donate them.

So, at least until it warms up enough for bare legs and sandals and spring dresses and bright capris, I’ll be wearing black and navy pants. On alternating days.

And checking the weather channel. Often.

Update. I found my pants. In a closet. I have a vague recollection of thinking if I left them in that bag, I might accidentally donate them to Goodwill, so I hung them up. I apparently have NO MEMORY.

Binge And Purge

So, I have been binging and purging. NO, silly. Not FOOD. Who would want to waste a perfectly good iced sugar cookie that way? I'm talking about my spring wardrobe.

Liz came over the other day and, after seeing the extraordinary number of capris I have, she suggested I might need some help in purging my wardrobe. Picture me laughing out loud. She sometimes forgets she is MY CHILD and I taught her everything she knows about binging on clothes and shoes and then having to purge. Everything she knows. So. I had to do the annual purging.

Remember the checked capris? Well, once I tried them all on, I realized the new ones fit much better than the old ones. So they are out of here.

The tops that have to go because, even though I love them and bought them in every color, because as you know, that IS my philosophy, they are too tight and short. These tops also have a fond memory for me about the time I demonstrated that, in actuality, I have NO MEMORY. I bought one of these tops in a hot yellow and white stripe and brought it home, then realized it was too sheer. Dude. I did this TWICE. The second time it was like "Oh, this is so cute and I didn't know they had it in yellow and I'll buy it too" and then I got it home and tried it on and remembered I had already bought it once and returned it. If only tops could talk that yellow and white one would be saying something rude, I am sure.



The top that was not really a pretty color but it fit and looked pretty good but never really matched anything. It has to go.



The top that never matched anything but was an Izod and I hated to get rid of it but when I took it out of the closet, it had a hole in the sideseam. Snap. What a relief. Out the door.



The top that I have loved with all my heart and has been worn with many a pair of white shorts and slacks and has gone on several cruises but is just simply too tight and short now. Sadly. Out the door.



The top that mysteriously shrank over the year. Seriously. I weigh the same as I did last summer. Although this is not necessarily a good thing. I SHOULD weight LESS.



The darling white top that was always too low cut. I have tried a cami under it and seriously though about buying one of these, after Big Mama talked about them. But I decided that was way too much trouble and I could find another white top. Out it goes.



And, in further fashion news. I am going to a baby shower and here is the outfit I am wearing. Remember all those white capris? See how I NEED them all?

But here's my problem. Which pair of green shoes should I wear?

What's that? You think I have TOO MANY green shoes. Oh, my. If you think that, then you are obviously reading THE WRONG BLOG.

And. In further fashion news. Tom saw the three pairs of green shoes lined up on the bed and said I had a shoe fetish. I said, you mean shoe obsession, not shoe fetish. Because that would be weird. A shoe obsession is PERFECTLY NORMAL. Then he said all three pairs looked alike. And then I put my fingers in my ears and went nananananananana...I can't hear you. Because that is just perfectly ridiculous. They are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.